Week of 29 August 2012

No Legion appearances again this week.

From the back issues bin I got Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen 45 (1960/06), which features the adorable super-powered Tom Baker, aka Power Lad.

Not only is Tom gorgeous, but he's also obviously gay. Let's start with the introduction:

What Superman actually said: "Jimmy, while I'm out of town I know you'll miss my sweet lovin'. Go find Tom Baker, and he'll keep you satisfied. Tip: Ask to see his 'power coil.'"

Power coil...right. I've never heard it called that before.

There's an explosion, and Tom gets super-powers, which he promptly demonstrates to Jimmy: super-blowing ability, super-bending-over, and super-massaging-balls. (I am not making this up.)

Tom quickly gives Jimmy "a ride" that leaves the young reporter breathless and in need of repair. Ahem.

"Super-experiment"...right. Call it whatever you want, Jimmy. (Notice how Tom's shirt is ripped? That was some super-experiment.)

Oh come on now, who but a gay boy would run out to see top fashion designers and get not one, but three different outfits? (I swear, I am not making this up.)

Again with the super-blowing. 

With repeated super-pile-driving thrusts, Tom widens the tunnel. I suppose this explains why Jimmy needed repair.

Oh, Lucy, delude yourself all you want...it's not you Power Lad is looking at lustfully. He's using his x-ray vision to check out Jimmy.

Superman returns from out-of-town, and...

A "big thing," eh? I'll bet.

This pose pretty much speaks for itself.

It turns out (surprise!) that Tom Baker is not who he claims...

He is, in fact, an exchange student from Kandor, pinch-hitting for Superman and...er...taking care of Jimmy's needs while the Man of Steel was away. (That's the way Kandor looked in the old days.)

And this is the clincher...his name is Dik-Rey. Obviously, this lad is a Kandorian gay porn star, which is why Superman chose him to keep up with Jimmy's insatiable sexual appetite.

So there it is, Jimmy's gay Kandorian boyfriend. I don't know about you, but I think Dik-Rey should travel to the 31st century and apply for Legion membership. Or, I don't know, maybe he and Dev-Em could get some hot Kryptonian action going?

I'll leave you with one last picture of good ol' Dik: